I Lied.

I am a total liar. I know. I guess we all knew. But I really am going on hiatus after this.


Something really important happened that needed to be blogged about immediately. My very good friend, Eve just published a book!! And you should buy her book; here. She invokes my mighty name in her book too if that sweetens the deal for any of you.

You know you want to read this.

I’ve read this book three times now. She’s a brilliant writer. And I’m not just saying that because I know and like her. I tend to read everything an author has written once I find someone I like.


And I intend to read everything she has written; even if I have to break into her house and steal her laptop…  Hopefully she will continue to give in to my peer pressure to keep publishing more of her work. The world needs more talented authors like her.


Maybe you weren’t planning on buying any books this year. Or some of you might say, but I only buy books from so and so (Stephen King is my number one). But let me tell you why you are wrong.


If you don’t buy any books then you are just wrong and how dare you. And if you buy a book from some famous author that already has money and an established fan base then you are just adding to that person’s unhealthy addiction. Sorry, Stephen King.


But, if you buy a book from Eve, then you are supporting a brilliant writer. And adding to her unhealthy addictions. She could become a wino with your help. And then take me out to drink wine.


And me drinking wine really only adds to the stupid/hilarious fodder of this blog. You’re really only helping yourselves here. Also: I have not been drunk for a single one of these stories thus far. Let that sink in and then imagine how much stupider I am drunk.
That’s right. You could be contributing to that. So do it! Here.